Pressure to become a ‘perfect mother’: 22% of mothers in the country are in depression, the pressure to be happy all the time is dangerous.

Becoming a mother in India is now safer than ever. According to statistics, maternal mortality rate has declined. In 2014-16, there were 130 deaths per lakh births, which has now come down to 88. More than 89 percent of deliveries are now taking place in hospitals. But is a mother as healthy mentally as she is physically? According to the National Institute of Health, US, about 22 percent of women in India face serious mental health problems during pregnancy or after childbirth. These figures show that it is equally important to pay attention to the mental health of the mother along with her physical safety. On ‘National Safe Motherhood Day’ (April 11), it is important to understand that safe motherhood is linked to the birth of a healthy child as well as the mental health of the mother. Let us understand from the perspective of medical facts that unseen aspect of motherhood, which the society does not talk about even today. Know the 4 signs of danger related to the mental condition of women and the ways to deal with them. Bhaskar Expert Know the true meaning of safe motherhood from three experts, Dr. Sunila Khandelwal (Gynecologist and Obstetrician), Dr. Smita Vaid Consultant Gynecologist and Robotic Surgeon, Dr. Stuti California (Associate Professor at Berkeley Uni) 1. Positive Toxicity – 23 percent of mothers are affected during pregnancy. Fluctuations in estrogen and progesterone affect the brain, which further increases anxiety. Under the pressure of being forced to be happy, new mothers suppress their real emotions, which leads to feelings of anxiety, fatigue, and emotional disconnect. 14-23% of women are affected by clinical anxiety. Expert Tip – Do not put pressure on the pregnant woman to ‘be happy all the time’. If anxiety is high, take help from gynecologist as well as psychologist. 2. Tokophobia – Fear of delivery in 14 to 16.5% women. About 14-16% women struggle with tokophobia i.e. fear of delivery. This fear may be due to previous bad experience or labor pain. In such situations, many women choose C-section. Less support from family, unplanned pregnancy, pressure of having a boy and after the age of 35 the stress increases further. Expert Tip – Talk to the doctor about the delivery process and pain management. Fear can be reduced with antenatal classes, counseling and breathing exercises. 3. Inability to breastfeed – a major cause of stress for the mother. Only breastfeeding is recommended for the baby for the first 6 months. But after delivery, many women are not able to breastfeed even if they want to. There could be medical reasons behind this like lack of good diet, PCOS, thyroid, diabetes, breast surgery, deficiency of prolactin hormone, stress, excessive bleeding during delivery. Also, drinking less water after delivery is also a big reason for this. Expert Tip – If there is difficulty in breastfeeding, then formula feeding is an option. Simply, the child should not remain hungry. Discuss its quantity and method of administration with the pediatrician. 4. Depression after pregnancy – Distance and separation from the newborn. After delivery, about 70-80% of mothers undergo mental instability, which is called ‘baby blues’. There is fatigue, lack of sleep, and irritability for the first 2-3 days, which usually resolves in 1-2 weeks. But if these symptoms persist for a long time, it can lead to postpartum depression (PPD), which is seen in about 15-20% of women. It has symptoms like sadness, stress, changes in sleep and appetite, distance from the child, isolation from family and friends. In serious situations, the mother may harm herself or the child. According to experts, PPD cases are seen more in America because there is a trend of nuclear family, late marriage and late motherhood. Symptoms of PPD often appear after 6-8 weeks, and are treated with counseling, medications, and body-mind therapy. Expert Tip – Its biggest factor is lack of social support. Therefore, family support is very important for the mother. If any of these symptoms appear, immediately consult a doctor or mental health expert.